Familiar and New
by iloveromance
Summary: Realizing that he's lost Daphne forever, Niles decides that it's time to start his life anew. But where he ends up is nothing short of a twist of fate.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: I absolutely loved the story "Falling Slowly" that was written by Melinda08 and since that story is still in progress, she gave me her blessing to write my own version. I am crediting her with contributing to this first chapter and I hope that she will one day continue "Falling Slowly". I have a feeling that the two stories will be very different. **_

Niles wasn't sure why he was feeling this way. He was usually quite good at analyzing his feelings, but now he could find no words. Hurt, depressed, betrayed and miserable didn't even begin to scratch the surface of his emotional state. Despite what his father had said, or how sincerely the words had been spoken, Niles knew that there was no possible way that Martin Crane could "fix this" for him. There was no way to take back the events of last night.

Daphne Moon was engaged and it was all too clear that she would never be his.

Now, as he lay in his bed listening to the stillness, the idea that he'd lost her forever made him grieve in a way that he hadn't grieved since his mother had passed away. But he had no one to blame but himself. If he hadn't listened to Frasier, hadn't held back his feelings for Daphne then perhaps things would be very different now. And even if she had rejected him, at least she would have known how he felt. There was no doubt in his mind that her rejection would have been gentle, for she was so warm and gentle and had such a kind and caring heart. Besides, who in their right mind would ever possibly be angry at someone who says the words _I'm in love with you_?

But what if she hadn't rejected him? What if she had been feeling the same way, but was keeping quiet just as he had done? What if she'd confessed to Frasier many times that she had feelings for his younger brother and wasn't sure what to do? And what if Frasier had taken the same approach, by telling Daphne that it was wrong, instead encouraging her to find someone else?

A small flame of hope ignited within him as he imagined the scenario. What if Daphne had told him that she loved him too? What if Niles had been the one to lower to one knee, to promise to make her happy for the rest of his life? To feel the warmth of her lips on his when they kissed, celebrating the fact that she'd agreed to marry him.

But that flame of hope was quickly extinguished, leaving a smoldering pain in his heart as reality came rushing back. She was engaged to another man; a man named Donny Douglas.

Hope… Such a powerful word. Such a powerful emotion.

Niles realized that hope was the only thing that had kept him going all these years. He was grateful for it, for he knew he'd never be able to deal with his broken marriage and the way he was treated by the former Maris Crane. If only he hadn't gone over to Frasier's that night. He wouldn't have seen Donny lovingly look into Daphne's eyes and pledge his undying love to her. He wouldn't have felt the heartache that he was feeling now.

He'd known this moment was coming, for his father and brother had been kind enough to try to warn him ahead of time, albeit, making Niles think that Daphne's mother was dying. And when Niles went to her finally able to provide comfort without Frasier's interference… why, it wasn't comfort at all. It took the explanation of Frasier and his father to make Niles finally understand that Daphne was speaking not of her dying mother (who wasn't dying at all) but of her impending engagement.

Niles had tried to leave, but at Donny's insistence, all three Crane men were seated on the sofa, witness to Daphne's happiness. Little did she realize that her happiness is what had torn Niles' heart in two.

If only….

He was a failure, a coward. Why hadn't he spoken up at the moment Donny was on one knee? Why hadn't he said anything before? He had so many chances and he'd lost them all. And now…

He was choking on his misery and despair, drowning in sorrow. He had to leave Seattle forever. He wouldn't be able to cope. He'd miss his father and brother terribly of course, but in time he hoped they would understand. He considered never setting foot in Frasier's condominium again, but that would raise questions, lots of questions from his father, his colleagues, Mrs. Woodson, and most of all, from Daphne. But he was nothing here now. He was completely useless to his colleagues and his family, as the sorrow and misery consumed him.

He had to start anew. Where would he go? To paraphrase a line from a movie that Daphne once told him she loved so much, he had to go somewhere that didn't remind him of her, every time he walked around a corner. But he had no idea how to choose. There were so many places; so many possibilities. And so he did the easiest thing he could think of. He climbed out of bed (which, he learned quickly wasn't so easy) and threw on his robe. Within seconds he was downstairs in his library where he grabbed a map of the U.S. He considered other countries, but the United States would be easier, and most likely safer.

He opened the map and spread it out on his desk. And then, like a child playing pin-the-tail –on-the donkey, he closed his eyes and touched the paper with his index finger. His heart actually beat faster in anticipation as he opened his eyes, almost fearful of where he had chosen, for he'd vowed that the decision was to be made in that fateful moment.

And what a fateful moment it was. For the city he'd chosen was one he was all-too familiar with, even though he'd never lived there. He was moving to the state of Massachusetts.

Or, to be more precise, Boston.


	2. Chapter 2

He'd only been to Boston a couple of times (both with Maris), and long before he knew that an angel named Daphne Moon existed. He and Maris had come to visit Frasier and Lilith, much to Maris' annoyance. But at the time, Niles was oblivious to his then-wife's cruel personality, putting his love for her high above reality. And Maris, to her credit, agreed to accompany him (for appearance's sake, he assured her), putting up with Lilith's constant questions.

Boston was an absolutely beautiful city, rich and alive with so much history that it would take even the most knowledgeable resident a lifetime to absorb it all. But Niles was definitely up for a challenge. It would be quite a change from the often-quiet and overcast city of Seattle, but it was a change that he looked foreword to. At least in Boston he wouldn't be reminded of Daphne every time he turned the corner.

With a renewed sense of optimism, albeit a small one, he took advantage of a brief respite from his deep depression and despair and sat down at his computer. His fingers tapped rapidly on the keys and he was surprised at how easy the internet made it to find not only a flight, but a readily available apartment (not as exquisite as the Montana but not as shoddy as the Shangri-La... it was somewhere in the middle, which, under the circumstances, suited him just fine) and even a colleague whom he had no idea was living in the Boston area. One brief email to his long-lost friend was all it took and he received a quick reply, with a request to call in the morning and Niles would be welcome to join the practice. Unlike Seattle, it wouldn't be Niles' own practice, but that would come in time. He was, after all, starting over.

Soon his flight was booked, the movers were notified and his accounts had been transferred; all at the click of the mouse and a few buttons; a result of the wonders of the internet. It was, by all accounts, fascinating that a computer could do so many things. He just never dreamed that it would provide him the tools to create a whole new life. It was a life that he would lead without his family, his friends... and without the woman he loved.

In less than a week's time he'd be sitting on a plane (in a First-Class seat of course), en route to his new home in Boston. There would be a magnitude of things to do there; settling into a new job, a new home, making new contacts (both business and personal) and of course the somewhat daunting task of contacting Lilith and Frederick to let them know that he'd decided to make Boston his home. Contacting them certainly wasn't a requirement, but a duty in his eyes. Even though Dr. Lilith Sternin was no longer his sister-in-law, she was still family; forever tied to Frasier by the way of young Frederick.

However, in Seattle there was even more to do. Settling his affairs, bidding farewell to his friends, neighbors and colleges and leaving old haunts. But the hardest was what he had to do immediately:

Tell his dad, Frasier and Daphne goodbye.


	3. Chapter 3

Niles swallowed hard as he climbed out of his Mercedes and shut the door. He looked around the parking garage, suddenly feeling sentimental. It was strange to think that this would likely be the last time that he'd ever see it.

He took a deep breath and let it out; aware of the way it shuddered. Perhaps it was ridiculous, becoming emotional about a stuffy, dingy garage. But there were memories here; so many memories. It would be incredibly easy to call the whole thing off. The move… everything. But he couldn't stay in Seattle, he knew that now. He couldn't stay here knowing that Daphne was engaged to another man. He remembered vividly (lest he ever be able to forget it) the declaration of love and the moment that sealed his fate.

She did not and would not ever love him in any way but friendship.

The moisture filled his eyes and he blinked back tears, determined to keep a happy demeanor for as long as he could. And then he headed into the building where he was greeted by Morrie. He'd known the doorman for years, since the first day that he, Niles, had visited Frasier in his new home. It seemed like ages ago. And it was. At first, he and Morrie exchanged casual hellos and goodbyes. But over time their meetings became more personal. It was a slow process, one that began with general questions about well-being and then questions about the family. They were simple questions of course, but questions that showed concern. And from that moment on a friendship was formed.

Yes, saying goodbye to Morrie was bound to be just as difficult as saying goodbye to his family.

"Good evening Dr. Crane. How are you this evening?"

Niles smiled at Morrie now, wondering if he should break the news or wait until he had spoken to Frasier and his dad. He decided on the latter. He smiled and extended his hand.

"It's nice to see you, Morrie, but please, call me _Niles_. We've been friends much too long for formalities."

Morrie nodded. "You're right, Niles. How are you? It's been a while."

"I'm fine Morrie. More than fine, actually. I'm about to embark on a brand new adventure." The straightforwardness of the statement hid its meaning but the importance was not lost on Niles, who swallowed hard, realizing that reality was drawing closer and closer. Again he swallowed hard, hoping he sounded more confident than he felt.

To his credit, Morrie smiled and nodded. "That's wonderful, Niles. I wish you nothing but the very best."

Niles nodded and shook Morrie's hand, fighting back tears. "Thank you, Morrie. That means a lot to me."

As he headed through the lobby and stepped into the elevator, he smiled once more at his friend. But his heart grew heavy, knowing what was to come. God knew that he'd done some difficult things in his life, and he'd some of them had put him through complete hell. But this… the reality of telling his family (especially Daphne) that he was leaving… possibly forever… was going to be the most difficult of all.


	4. Chapter 4

The moment that the elevator doors opened, Niles wished that he could turn around and go home. What would be the harm in sending an email from the plane en route to Boston? Or he could send a letter, the old-fashioned way, pouring his heart out in words put on paper. He was certain that his family would understand. Of course they would be hurt, angry and upset when they learned that he had left so abruptly, but in time he hoped that they would realize that he did what he had done for a reason.

He cursed under his breath. Who was he kidding? He couldn't leave without saying goodbye and he certainly couldn't do it on a stuffy plane. He had to do it in person. Frasier, his dad and Daphne would be more than angry if he were to take that route. They'd be absolutely furious and might not ever forgive him. And it went without saying that the guilt would follow Niles all the way across the country to Boston and back again. But he wasn't coming back.

So how could he go about telling the people that they loved the most that he was starting a new life? The thought was impossible. By leaving Seattle for Boston, Niles was essentially trading places with his older brother. While Frasier's journey to Boston was mainly due to his schooling, Niles had a very different reason for moving to the city affectionately known as _Beantown_. His heart had been shattered beyond repair.

The mere thought of it made his chest physically hurt. Oh, how it hurt. Each breath he took was agonizing, and all because he'd lost the woman he loved. However, facing the music, as the saying went, was what he had to do.

He wasn't even aware that he'd knocked on the door when it opened, revealing a beautiful sight. It was a sight so beautiful that he was sure he might faint. His heart was thundering, making the weak parts inside of him even weaker. Oh why of all people did Daphne have to answer the door? Wasn't that Frasier's job? It was, after all, his home.

"Dr. Crane…"

He didn't look at her. He couldn't. To do so was just too painful. And painful wasn't even the right word for it. Excruciating was more accurate. But he couldn't just stand idly by like the fool that he had become. Rarely had he referred to himself, even silently, in such a derogatory manner and he was sure that had she heard him, Daphne would scold him in that sweet voice of hers as she had always done whenever he put himself down. But his thought was justified. He was a fool.

What was wrong with him that he couldn't muster even the slightest bit of courage to ask her on a date? It was bold, that was certain, but the fantasy had danced through his had a hundred times over:

_He'd asked her out on a date. Nothing fancy, just coffee at Nervosa perhaps. In the midst of small talk, he'd slowly let his feelings out. She was of course stunned by his words, but then she smiled and reached across the table for his hand, confessing to him that she felt the same way about him. She loved him too.  
He rarely thought about the alternative, that in which she became angry or offended, or simply told him that she did not love him and never would, and how dare he even suggest such a thing_.

Thinking back now, a rejection would have been much easier to take. Instead she was stolen from him by another man, never knowing how deeply Niles loved her. But the reality was that Niles never had her in the first place.

Daringly his eyes met hers and as he expected, he saw the compassion and concern in them. He should have been comforted by the way she seemed to care, but it only made the hurt inside of him increase.

"Dr. Crane, are you all right?"

For a moment he didn't even realize that she was speaking to him. That is, until her hand reached for his and pulled gently.

"Dr. Crane, come inside."

Blindly he moved his feet until he was standing in his brother's living room, barely having any recollection of how he'd gotten there.

"Can I get you anything? Some lunch perhaps? I can make you a sandwich, or-."

"No, no… I'm fine. I-is Frasier here?"

She smiled. "He certainly is, but he's terribly busy."

It was just the out he needed and he turned on his heel. "Oh, well, I can-."

But her hand on his shoulder turned him to face her. "No, it's no trouble. I'll get him. He and your father are putting together some kind of contraption that your father bought at Ikea. What a funny name for a store, don't you think, Dr. Crane?"

When he didn't answer, she continued. "They've been at it for a while and I'm sure they could use a break. I'll be right back." She took a few steps into the hallway and paused. "Unless you'd like to join them. I'm sure they'd be happy to-."

"No!"

The word was sharp and he regretted it immediately. But even seeing the surprised look on her face didn't improve his mood. He simply felt worse for hurting her even if it was completely unintentional.

"I-I see…" her voice was different now. Softer.

"Can you get them for me, Daphne? Dad and Frasier? It's imperative that I speak with them right away."

The harsh tone still hung in his voice and Daphne nodded like a child who had been scolded.

"Y-yes Dr. Crane. I'll get your father and brother right now. I'll be right back."

He did not look at her. He couldn't. It hurt too damn much.


End file.
